Tuesday, May 15, 2012

One Great Thing

When I saw this blog topic, I got nervous. I couldn't think of something I did well enough to blog about. First of all, I don't want to brag or make anybody feel badly if I said I did something well and a reader feels he or she does not. But, really, I was stymied in coming up with something to say; writing skill or academic achievement doesn't really fit here.

Achievement has always seemed to come in spite of diabetes, not because of it. I had always considered myself a sub-par diabetic. I can't be perfect at diabetes, or even very good most of the time. Is that my fault, or is it diabetes' fault? It's probably a lot of the latter. I'm not used to getting praise for trying hard. I'm used to getting praise for being good at what I do, or not getting praise at all.

I've had a few excellent days with the range of my glucose results lately, however, including one day where none of my tests were above 8.5 or below 4.6. I attribute that to a sudden decrease in carbohydrates in my household, not necessarily to myself. I've just joined a gym, and I've gone and exercised almost every day since I did so, but maybe I could exercise more, or harder, even though I'm just getting re-started. I keep trying to frame this in a positive light about myself. It’s hard to do!

And then, I thought: but I *do* try. I try all the time. I'm good at trying with a condition that’s extremely trying. I made a decision to change the status quo, which was me taking a laissez-faire, backseat attitude to my diabetes, being okay with not testing often at all, using diabetes to lose weight, and I turned that around to the best of my ability. Okay, I don't test 20 times a day. I can't afford to. But I test four or five. I never miss a doctor's appointment, and I have many. I get my various parts checked as often as I'm supposed to. I take an active interest in keeping my pump settings current. I got involved. I could have happily stayed stuck in my rut, especially because I've gained weight since I started on the pump, and I hate that. But I took my A1c down from 9 to 7.3 in six months.

I'm not sure if I have "one great thing." I have room for improvement everywhere. But I made a change in my life, and I stuck to it. And at this point, I think that’s pretty great.




  2. Trying is a very important (and not so easy) thing to do! I admire how you've matured in your approach to diabetes - and hope to join you someday in the land of Taking Health Seriously.

    1. Thanks, Kate - it's been a long and winding road, this process. I know I should have done it years ago but I don't think I was ready. Which doesn't make it okay, but I do understand and sympathize with my former self (she's not that far away from me)! Let me know if you ever want to talk about this stuff.

  3. Hi Ilana,

    I was wondering if you accepted any guest posting on your site. You have had some great Diabetes Blog Week posts and I was wondering if we could contribute one about Diabetes medication safety.

    I couldn’t manage to find your email on the site. If you could get a hold of me at jeff@drugwatch.com, I would greatly appreciate it!


    1. Hi Jeff,

      Thanks for the lovely comment! I definitely appreciate it. As far as guest posting goes, I haven't actually had this blog for too long - I just started it last month - so at this early stage in the blog's life I think I'd like to keep it as a space for me for the time being. It's a flattering offer, though, and I will let you know if I change my mind.